I have definitely been riding the wave of COVID-19. The first few days were nice. We made two hats of activities for Jonah; self-lead activities and then family activities. I was able to continue cooking and freezing meals. We played board games, went for a walk, Kelly and Jonah played catch in the backyard while Tessa sunbathed and I did yoga on my mat on the patio. We grilled for dinner because it was so beautiful. Kelly had a little photo journal project documenting all of our fun. Then there was yesterday: it was POW. I was feeling the feels, anxious, couldn’t concentrate, trying to tele-work and having all of that invade our home. Even Mable and Maize are acting weird following us around the house MEOWING and swatting at Tessa. The pack needed some centering!

One lesson I see women, especially Moms of all varieties, struggle with is the idea of tending to their own emotional balance first and then their families. Everyone has heard the plane analogy that in a case of emergency put on your own oxygen mask and then help your children. Well, COVID-19 is the current emergency so I say, game on! Tend to your emotional self first, be aligned in your mind, body, and spirit; then you show up in a productive and thoughtful way for your family, friends, and co-workers during this unprecedented time.

One great way to start is carve out your own meditation space. One of Kelly’s friends asked for some recommendations for her “Zen Den” and I wanted to share with everyone.

First, your alter:

You can internet search any of this to get even more ideas or education. There is symbolism in each aspect of your alter. The wall your alter is on and the wall your alter faces represents a purpose. My alter is on the eastern wall because east represents air, the purpose of communication. New beginnings are on the east because the rising sun marks a new day. My alter faces west which represents creativity.

On your alter you want to represent the five elements:

• Air Element – can be represented by incense, palo santo – purpose, brings about possibilities
• Water Element – can be represented by a vase of water or even a glass of water – purpose, connection to the higher good/ greater good
• Earth Element – can be represented by crystals, feather, leaf – purpose, holds the seeds of your intention that can grow into unlimited possibilities, new possibilities
• Fire Element – can be represented by a candle – brings power, strength, and passion to manifest
• Sky Element – lies above the other four elements, can be represented by anything celestial, holy, spiritual or heavenly.

In the center of your alter place a dish. In the dish you place any prayer you are offering up. Maybe it is a letting go. Maybe it is a calling in. Once you put it on the paper and place it in the dish then you have offered it to the Spirits. You no longer need to give it your energy (thoughts, worry, attention). When it comes back into your thoughts, you remind yourself you gave it to Spirit and you let it go. The Universe created all that is: the earth, the elements, the people, the supernovas, atoms, and elephants. If she can create all of that, she can help us get out of our own way, to tune into our own truth. We know. We are just disconnected and distracted; meditation brings us back.

Your Practice, Meditation:

I have found that silent meditation is the healer for all hurts and injustices. It is powerfully simple which makes it simply difficult so many people miss the opportunity. Meditation fundamentally shifts your perspective and thus your perceptions.

There is a great meditation app that is free called Insight Timer. You can set the sound to start and end your meditation. You can select how long you want to meditate for. There are also ambient sounds you can play in the background. Those are just the basics, they have guided meditations, meditations for kids, community, all sorts of stuff you can explore.

Even establishing a meditation practice is healing, be gentle with yourself. Start with a short duration, 3 minutes, and build from there. Let each element be a way of slowing down and tuning in.

Be comfortable in your seat. You can sit on a meditation cushion, a folded blanket, or in a chair (if you are in a chair keep both feet on the floor and sit towards the front of the chair so you are holding your own back). Be tall in your spine but soft in your shoulders and your belly. I use to change the position of my hands when I meditated. One option is to rest your palms face down near your knees for a grounding energy. For an uplifting energy simply face your palms up and rest the back of your hands near your knees. Allow your chin to dip towards your heart and you can either let your eyes be lazy or close them.

If your body begins to feel uncomfortable and your thoughts go to how your body is feeling then adjust. If you feel fidgety because you sympathetic nervous system is going into shock because you actually found stillness, then just ride the wave and let your body settle.

Once you settle the body then you settle your mind. One practice is to count your inhales and exhales. When your mind wonders start back at one. Inhale one, exhale one. Inhale two, exhale two. Another practice is to focus the mind on feeling the breath fill your body and leave your body. You can also find a mantra and chant the mantra. The purpose is to still the mind, when a thought pops up, recognize it, “thought”, and then go back to your breath work or mantra. Notice the judgments or criticisms you have when your mind wonders. Notice any assumptions you make. Any expectations that arise. Be kind to yourself in thought.

Sit in your meditation every day. Yes, every day. The amount of time you sit will eventually be what it needs to be but only if you sit every day. It is ideal if it can be at the same time each day. First just get the meditation practice going and then allow it to evolve into what feels best. For me I have to mediate in the morning. It isn’t always the exact same time each morning but it is always the first thing I do.

Have fun! Décor:

Everyone can feel energy if they tune in and slow down. When you enter your Zen Den, does it feel calm, relaxing, do you want to be in there? Grab old candles from around your house and bring them into the room. Find lamps instead of overhead lights. Plants, plants, plants. I have slowly been building a library in my meditation room of books that are important to my practice. Grab pillows and blankets and make a little mush mound where you can curl up. Lights around the baseboards. I was raised Catholic and always felt an affinity to Mary so she is on my alter right next to my Buddha. Place an area rug to warm the room. Bring anything into the room that makes your soul smile.

There are different types of meditation and different practices. Explore the varieties until you find one that feels right both in the teachings and the actual practice. Be curious and know that when you commit to your practice it will guide you to a deeper desire to learn.